kennymccormick: (Default)
[personal profile] kennymccormick
--bootyInspector [BI] has started pestering caligulasAquarium [CA]!--

BI: yo hey dude what's a bucket and why'd it be embarrassing for your dad to find it
CA: no
BI: :| mann
BI: where's terezita I'll ask her lol
CA: wwhy on fuckin troll titans twisted taint wwould you wwant to knoww
BI: multiculturalism :D

CA: youre sayin you dont havve buckets on earth
CA: pails
BI: isthat like slang for condoms
CA: i knoww you dont use em in porn but its hard to believve you dont havve em
CA: wwhats a condom
BI: keeps you from getting a girl pregnant
CA: thats disgustin
BI: or getting herpes supposedly fuck that I've gotten it like three times either way
BI: bullshit
CA: i dont evven wwant to knoww wwhat herpes is neither
BI: sex disease hahah
CA: you humans are fuckin cursed
BI: dude whatever like 50% of people have herpes its nbd
BI: it's not like it's aids or shit
CA: youvve got sex diseases and pregancy and all all sorts a mammalian concerns that plague youre wwhole rotten species
CA: thank glubbin cod you didnt bring human wwomen wwith you
BI: :,(
CA: that last thing wwe need is a pregant female human wwith herpes or "Aids" wwhatevver the fuck that is
CA: but at least you figured out a wway to curb it
CA: fuckin condoms
CA: howw do they wwork
BI: aids is another sex disease lol but worse
BI: herpes is a pita but aids'll kill you I guess haha
CA: oh so noww i get it
CA: it howw youre species handles cullin
CA: through sex diseases
CA: the shitty lovvers just off each other
BI: uhhhhhhh yeah kinda ?
BI: I mean like if you're a hooker and you get fuckin like, aids and hep c yeah you'll die
CA: are any a you shitty lovvers
BI: sometimes people get it from like, other shit tho
BI: like their bf's been sleeping around behind their back or they got like, dirty needles from somebody
CA: more importantly is the christophe human or the l2s human a shitty lovver
CA: and if wwe are do the havve the diseases
BI: man this stripper I knew in denver got fucking hep from her fuckin diabetics supplies cuz her roomate was using them for drugs and didn't clean all the like
BI: blood or whatever out of it
CA: and if they do howw are they spread
BI: fucked up
CA: thats fine and all but tell me howw they spread
BI: like
CA: is it only through sex
BI: stds uhh
BI: yeah you get them with like, unprotected sex (wrap your junk dude!)
CA: wwrap
BI: or like, sharing dirty needles
BI: or
CA: wwith what
BI: idk anything that's like, sex fluids or blood fluids
BI: on your delicate shit or in you
CA: you wwrap your bulges
BI: yeah lol that's what a condom is
CA: wwhy on FUCKIN earth wwould that evven be somethin you wwould evven REMOTELY put youtself through
BI: to keep your spooge in
BI: so you don't knock some girl up or give her something
BI: also to keep all her like, soft tissues off yours hahah
CA: spooge
CA: thats
BI: I got a pamplet of this shit if you want it
CA: thats wwhats in the one humans name
BI: lol dude right
BI: fucking stan hahaha
CA: wwait
CA: so he loves to
CA: spooge
CA: what is pooge
CA: spooge*
BI: spooge is like
BI: semen?
CA: semen
BI: uhh
CA: seamen
CA: i lovve seamen too
CA: i am one
BI: ~wacky alien fertilizing body fluid~ or however-
BI: omfg
BI: fsdjklfasdjfklsdf omfg
BI: omg
CA: but i doubt thats wwh - oh
CA: no
CA: wwait so the l2s human
CA: loves to
CA: spooge
BI: yeah lol but he's just being a shit
BI: there's no way wendy's banging him that regularly lol
CA: you answwer me right now
CA: prince to princess
CA: is he a bad lovver
CA: does he havve these diseases
BI: uhh
BI: ok lol I can't say whether he's good/bad cuz there's lines you don't fuck past and it's called seeing you shit your pants in preschool
BI: but no he's probably clean
BI: I mean dude's been dating wendy for like
BI: yeeears
CA: yet he still likes to spooge
BI: well dude yeah who doesn't
CA: and spooge carries these diseases
CA: so evven if this spooge touches you
BI: like you guys have way too much porn for you to not jerk it
CA: you get it
CA: and that friend of yours lovves doin it
CA: lovves spoogin on evveryone and evveryfin
CA: spoogin the fuck up
BI: nah dude like
BI: it's like uhh
BI: ok I don't know what kind of troll sickness shit you guys have
CA: wwe havve blood diseases but thats only usually found in the lowwer castes
BI: but you have to catch something from like, fucking around with strangers and not using protection
BI: and THEN you can give somebody the clap w/your spooge
CA: wwe dont havve that problem
BI: normal spooge is just
BI: like it's part of making babies
BI: that's all
BI: nice and clean hahaah
CA: so its genetic material
BI: lol see I knew you guys were gonna have a sweetass alien word for it
CA: genetic material that carries diseases
CA: and you cant tell me 100% that your human friend doesnt carry anyfin
CA: in his spooge
CA: dear cod
BI: I mean dude I'm like, 99.9999999% sure
CA: no trolls dont havve fuckin sex diseases and wwe certainly dont wwrap our bulges
CA: ours arent pointless and immoble and pathetic like yours
BI: lol well you guys only fuck your soulmates or whatever
CA: wwe need fuckin room
BI: so yeah stds probably aren't a
BI: thing
BI: lol
CA: no wwe dont fuck our soulmates you pandeprivved pervert
CA: wwould you fuck your fat friend
BI: nah that'd be weird
CA: precisely
CA: wwe fill buckets wwith our designated concuspicient quadrants
BI: ok lol man I thought I was doing really good with the vocab shit here
BI: aren't all your like triangles and shit like
BI: ~~~~destined from fate~~~~
BI: that's what shouty said
CA: in a wway
CA: but your moirail more than anyfin is fated
CA: and you dont do that to your moirail
CA: thats depravved
BI: yeah no sex with the monorail got it
BI: humans call their girlfriends and boyfriends soulmates if it's like
BI: super serious - gonna marry you - die old like in the notebook together kinda thing
CA: i wwatched that movvie
BI: dude right it's so shitty aahahah
BI: no bj was worth that
CA: i lovved it
BI: dude
CA: just kidding it wwas a horrible rendition of our troll notebook
CA: but ours didt havve the wweird red shit
CA: it wwas about moirails
CA: also yours had the wweird creepy element of the guy wwho wwouldnt take no for an answwer
CA: is that howw you all get laid
BI: lol if you're an asshole
CA: then wwhy make a movvie out of it
CA: i dont wwant to knoww
CA: talkin about your movvies pisses me off
BI: sorry? lol
BI: romance movies are dumb as fuck though dude try like
BI: transformers or something
CA: thats sols taste
CA: it seems pointless and cheap
CA: anywway so that you dont go shovvin buckets in our faces in the future
CA: wwhich wwould make me vomit
CA: vvomit*
BI: oh yeah!
BI: so what's the deal with the buckets they're not condoms I guess
CA: no i think i explained this at one point
CA: all troll eggs come from somefin called a mothergrub
CA: its huge and gross and only jadebloods can go near them
BI: like a queen bee, yea
CA: howw is it like a bee
CA: bees are for computers and for creatin the best fuckin narcotic this side a sgrub
BI: bee queens have all the baby bees, right?
BI: dude I dunno I was super high watching animal planet
CA: i guess on your planet
CA: but wwhatevver
CA: but its not like trolls can go wwalk up and pale the fuckin mothergrub
CA: that glubbin fowwl
CA: so wwhen matesprites or kismesis decide that their partner is suitable enough to havve decendents
CA: they fill a bucket wwith em and the drones come pick it up
BI: lol omg you guys like
BI: come in a bucket
BI: like stand around it and jerk it into a bucket
BI: dude that's weird, sorry
CA: theres different wways you can do it
CA: if youre really curious theres a book
CA: [[ca wwants to sent bucket_sutra.zip]]
CA: some a these are fuckin impossible
CA: but youll get the picture
BI: yes
BI: sweet hahaha
BI: lemme look at this
CA: if i givve you that tell your fuckin l2s human to stop fuckin spoogin all ovver the place
CA: ill evven lend him a fuckin bucket if he really fuckin needs one
CA: #p41lfr06
CA: there
CA: bonus frog
BI: hahah ok
BI: dude what's the deal w/the frogs
CA: i dont fuckin knoww ask him
BI: dude I try and it's like
BI: two sentences and then a bunch of bitching about shouty
BI: and no legit frog info
CA: he bitches about shouty
BI: it's like fucking frog pokemon on spaceplanet over there for all I know
CA: wwhat does he say about kar
BI: uhhhh
BI: shit, that he's obnoxious?
CA: kneww
CA: it
CA: wwhos l2s moirail
CA: wwe need a fuckin chat
CA: since you clearly wwere not interested in auspicing thi
CA: s
BI: dude humans don't have monorails remember we just have bffs
CA: wwhos his bff
BI: kyle
BI: but hey no dude I said I'd tell stan to knock it off but I'm not doing this weirdass
BI: troll dating without sex shit
BI: committment
BI: thing
CA: wwell it didnt wwork didnt it
BI: lol cuz I didn't say anything
CA: then fuckin do it
BI: cuz shouty got pissed and told me to fuck off hahaha
CA: thats just kar
CA: im politely fuckin askin you noww do go through wwith it
CA: its gettin out a claw
CA: w
BI: dude I really am like not
CA: especially wwith this spooge shit
BI: dating you guys
CA: talk to him then for fucks sake this cant be that hard
BI: lol stan isn't spooging on anything but his socks right now
CA: wwhy
BI: cuz wendy's back on earth?
CA: wwhy on fuckin earth wwould he pail a sock
BI: cuz....he's jerking it....because nobody's banging him.....
BI: this is some serious like dr sue shit here man
BI: *ruth
CA: wwhy not
CA: ugh
CA: use
CA: dont you have fuckin shit better than a sock
CA: here
BI: lol well I do
BI: but stan's pretty vanilla hahaha
CA: ill givve you this code for the sake a that l2s human nevver gettin his spooge anywwhere near us
CA: #8u1638108
CA: givve that to him and tell him to stop ruinin his socks
BI: hahaha cool, dude, will do
CA: and keep awway from my moirail
BI: dudes he's really not like
BI: stan is like, the straightest dude I know
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kennymccormick

July 2014

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